Dumb Information

Pimp Hand of Al Swearingin: Coke VS. Pepsi

Posted in 2nd Amendment, Advertising, Conspiracy, diet, Drinking, Drugs, guns, Mainstream Media, Media, Obama, TV by Chop on 14 February 2009

How long have we as a human race had to endure ads on the Coke vs. Pepsi controversy? Every time I turn on the radio, or change the channel, or walk out of my bathroom after a nice reading of Money, Popular Science or Mental_Floss magazine, the duel to the death hits me in the face. Since the early ‘70’s (yeah I am that old but still can kick your ass), the media has forced us to swallow this fight without the refreshment of swallowing the product. Pepsi is the greatest, no Coke is the greatest, no wait, it just maybe RC Cola, just kidding, its either Pepsi or Coke, are we clear. I, the Honorable Al Swearingin, aim to end this battle once and for all.
There is no comparison, period, and I am sick of some freak boy with a microphone telling me that there is. For those of you who really take this seriously, I will set the record straight once and for all.
Pepsi’s advertising ploy through the years has been based solely off of preference instead of the facts, the true taste and feeling of slamming back a carbonated can in the middle of a hot summer day. As for myself, I will drink either product, but do however strongly prefer Coke over Pepsi, not because of the taste, but because of the feeling that a Coke gives that no other Cola can, no pun intended. I am sure that most of the nation agrees with me that neither product tastes that bad, but prefer one over the other. Like me, if you are a die hard Pepsi fanatic, if you opened the fridge on a Sunday afternoon looking for a quick swig of a carbonated drink and found only the dreaded Coke, you would pull it out and pop the top quicker than Obama nominations duck and run.
To give it a fighting chance, the PR writers at Pepsi Company have made the ads all about the taste, preference over facts. Hey, I can’t blame them; they learned that tactic from the mainstream media. But facts speak for themselves, facts that show that Coke has had the upper hand since the birth of Christ. Pepsi is all bark and no bite, and Coke has the bite, or sting, or kick in the ass that the rest of the class lacks. Its not about taste, it’s about the sting, as Mohammed Ali said it best, “float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” Nothing, except for maybe a viewing of your 401K statement, stings like Coke.
The purity of the feeling of a Coke rolling down the back of your throat on a hot summer day, the freakishly satisfying stinging sensation that it gives you, is truly amazing. No other carbonated product can give you that sensation, putting Coke head and shoulders above the competition. By the way, if any of you Coke advertisement gurus are reading this, and it winds up in some ad in Bakersfield, California, I am coming for my money; why you haven’t realized this as a selling tool is beyond me. Everyone knows it’s about the sting, Coke is gonna sting going down, and for some reason, its all good.
Take it from me, Al Swearingin, if you like the refreshing sting of a carbonated masterpiece, drink Coke. Now it’s settled, so stop advertising on my T.V.
Until next time the God fearin’ science lovin’ gun totin’ badass says believe in God, have a good time, and make sure you have plenty of ammo.

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Public Service Announcement: Gun Laws

Americans, you are staring down the barrel
of gun control.

DI has the solution, stick to your guns.

I received an e-mail the other day in regards to gun control measures over
the past century around the globe, and tossed it in my trash file.

I passed it up; because of course most chain e-mails are crap.

After a while, I felt for some reason compelled to dig it out the
cyberspace garbage can, thinking about my precious
Daewoo DP 51
9MM back at the house, and wondered what was in store for its uncertain future.

*Note from Porkchop*

I always have to cut in on anything having to do with weapons due to the fact
that the things I love most on this earth are weapons, women, tattoos, books,
Dumb Information and any site we are linked to,
and my camera.

I am personally a member of the church of Glock, but the
Corporal swears by this Daewoo.

I may have to fire it one day to see if it is really all that and a bag of Doritos.

*End Note*

My pistol is my form of home protection which (to go along with the riot
shotgun, an unmistakable sound racking a 12 gauge
when some innocent burglar stands between me and my family) have been
members of my home just as the dogs and fish have been.

I did a little research, only to find out that the numbers presented in the
e-mail were not far off if off at all, amazing.

Gun control has been a hot topic for the past several decades, and as the NRA
has increased in members, so have anti-gun activists, claiming that guns
are the reason for so much wrong in the world (I think the reason for
most of the wrong in the world is caused by the people like the anti-gun
activists, but that’s just my opinion).

Gun activists claim that guns don’t kill people, people kill people,
and so for the sake of argument, I will only present the numbers.

This will allow you, faithful DI Pride,
the ability to form your own opinion, completely unheard of in today’s
information superhighway.

 

Government

 

Dates

 

Targets

 

Civilians Killed

 

“Gun Control” Laws

 

Features of Over-all “Gun Control” scheme

 

Ottoman Turkey

 

1915-1917

 

Armenians

(mostly Christians)

 

1-1.5 million

 

Art. 166, Pen. Code, 1866 &
1911 Proclamation, 1915

 

• Permits required
•Government list of owners

•Ban on possession

 

Soviet Union

 

1929-1945

 

Political opponents;

farming communities

 

20 million

 

Resolutions, 1918

Decree, July 12, 1920

Art. 59 & 182, Pen. code, 1926

 

•Licensing of owners

•Ban on possession

•Severe penalties

 

Nazi Germany

& Occupied Europe

 

1933-1945

 

Political opponents;

Jews; Gypsies;

critics; “examples”

 

20 million

 

Law on Firearms & Ammo., 1928

Weapon Law, March 18, 1938

Regulations against Jews, 1938

 

•Registration & Licensing

•Stricter handgun laws

•Ban on possession

 

China, Nationalist

 

1927-1949

 

Political opponents;

army conscripts; others

 

10 million

 

Art. 205, Crim. Code, 1914

Art. 186-87, Crim. Code, 1935

 

•Government permit system

•Ban on private ownership

 

China, Red

 

1949-1952

1957-1960

1966-1976

 

Political opponents;

Rural populations

Enemies of the state

 

20-35 million

 

Act of Feb. 20, 1951

Act of Oct. 22, 1957

 

•Prison or death to “counter-revolutionary criminals” and anyone resisting any government program

•Death penalty for supply guns to such “criminals”

 

Guatemala

 

1960-1981

 

Mayans & other Indians;

political enemies

 

100,000- 200,000

 

Decree 36, Nov 25
Act of 1932

Decree 386, 1947

Decree 283, 1964

 

•Register guns & owners
•Licensing with high fees

•Prohibit carrying guns

•Bans on guns, sharp tools •Confiscation powers

 

Uganda

 

1971-1979

 

Christians

Political enemies

 

300,000

 

Firearms Ordinance, 1955

Firearms Act, 1970

 

•Register all guns & owners
•Licenses for transactions

•Warrantless searches •Confiscation powers

 

Cambodia

(Khmer Rouge)

 

1975-1979

 

Educated Persons;

Political enemies

 

2 million

 

Art. 322-328, Penal Code

Royal Ordinance 55, 1938

 

•Licenses for guns, owners, ammunition & transactions

•Photo ID with fingerprints

•License inspected quarterly

 

Rwanda

 

1994

 

Tutsi people

 

800,000

 

Decree-Law No. 12, 1979

 

•Register guns, owners, ammunition •Owners must justify need
•Concealable guns illegal
•Confiscating powers

 

 

This is information from the first site
that I visited, absolutely shocked me.

How could these numbers be correct, I pondered?

So, being the kind of person I am, I forged
ahead to find the truth, with site after site providing
me the same horrifying numbers.

The numbers only slightly changed, most of the time to a greater
number of deaths than the site before.

 

PERPETRATOR GOVERNMENT

 

DATE

 

TARGET

 

# MURDERED (ESTIMATED)

 

DATE OF GUN CONTROL LAW

 

SOURCE DOCUMENT

 

Ottoman Turkey

 

1915-1917

 

Armenians

 

1-1.5 million

 

1886

1911

 

Art. 166, Penal Code

Art. 166 Penal Code

 

Soviet Union

 

1929-1953

 

Anti-Communists

Anti-Stalinists

 

20 million

 

1929

 

Art. 182 Penal Code

 

Nazi Germany

& Occupied Europe

 

1933-1945

 

Jews, Gypsies, Anti-Nazis

 

13 million

 

1928

1938

 

Law on Firearms

& Ammunition, April 12

Weapons Law, March 18

 

China

 

1949-1952

1957-1960

1966-1976

 

Anti-Communists

Rural Populations

Pro-Reform Group

 

20 million

 

1935

1957

 

Arts. 186-7, Penal Code

Art. 9, Security Law, Oct. 22

 

Guatemala

 

1960-1981

 

Maya Indians

 

100,000

 

1871

1964

 

Decree 36, Nov 25

Decree 283, Oct 27

 

Uganda

 

1971-1979

 

Christians

Political Rivals

 

300,000

 

1955

1970

 

Firearms Ordinance

Firearms Act

 

Cambodia

 

1975-1979

 

Educated Persons

 

1 million – 3 million

 

1956

 

Arts. 322-8, Penal Code

 

 

I would have never believed this, but the sad reality is the fact that
for one reason or another, death tolls ranging from 55-100 million took
place during and after nationally mandated gun control laws worldwide.

In Lehman’s
terms, if this happened in America, the entire population of the
metropolitan areas of New York City, Los Angeles, Chicago, Houston,
Dallas, and Philadelphia
would be buried, and that is just using the low side when it comes to figures.

Gun control, is it worth your life or the life of someone around you?

Do the research, get out and figure this one out for yourself.

My two cents is this; I own more than three guns, and I have never used those
guns to kill another human.

Now, with that information, do guns kill people or do people kill people?

Make your own decisions in regards to this and everything else.

If knowledge is power, then power is all around you, it’s just up to you to find it.

*Note from Porkchop.*

Always remember these old sayings,

“Those who do not remember their history are doomed to repeat it.”

“A land with an armed society has citizens, a land with an unarmed society has subjects.”

“When seconds count between living or dying, the police are only minutes away.”

“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.”

“An armed society is a polite society.”

“The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.”

“Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the outcome of the vote.”

“Guard with jealous attention the public liberty. Suspect everyone who comes near that precious jewel. Unfortunately, nothing
will preserve it but downright force. When you give up that force, you are ruined.”

“Americans have the right and advantage of being armed- unlike the citizens of other countries whose governments are afraid to trust the people with arms.”

“Dangerous laws created by well intentioned people today can be used by dangerous people with evil intentions tomorrow.”

“Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.”

“What country can preserve its liberties if its rulers are not warned from time to time that the people preserve the spirit of resistance?”

“Gun control has cleared the way for seven major genocides since 1915, in which governments gone bad murdered 56,000,000 persons, including millions of children.”

“I sympathize with people who want to ban guns, but I can’t agree with them. We have to be careful in our zeal to abolish guns that we don’t wind up with counter-productive legislation that will leave armed only the people most likely to do harm with them.”

“One of the ordinary modes, by which tyrants accomplish their purposes without resistance, is, by disarming the people, and making it an offense to keep arms.”

“Firearms stand next in importance to the Constitution itself! They are the American people’s Liberty Teeth and keystone under Independence. From the hour the Pilgrims landed, to the present day, events, occurrences, and tendencies prove that to insure peace, security, and happiness, the rifle and pistol are equally indispensable. The very atmosphere of firearms everywhere, restrains evil interference — they deserve a place of honor with all that’s good!”

“When the people fear their government, there is tyranny; when the government fears the people, there is liberty.”

“A free people ought not only to be armed and disciplined but they should have sufficient arms and ammunition to maintain a status of independence from any who might attempt to abuse them, which would include their own government.”

“The beauty of the Second Amendment is that it will not be needed until they try to take it.”

“Assault is a type of behavior, not a type of hardware.”

“These Sarah Brady types must be educated to understand that because we have an armed citizenry, that a dictatorship has not happened in America. These anti-gun fools are more dangerous to Liberty than street criminals or foreign spies.”

“Guns are not always the answer, but obtaining a firearm has saved the lives of many… While I favor keeping guns out of the hands of felons, youths and the mentally impaired, I oppose adding more bureaucratic obstacles that attempt to fight crime by disarming its victims.”

“A woman who demands further gun control legislation is like a chicken who roots for Colonel Sanders.”

“Arms are the only true badge of liberty. The possession of arms is the distinction of a free man from a slave.”