Dumb Information

The Blue Brothers

Posted in Asia, diet, Health, Japan, Medical, Mongolia, Sport by Chop on 6 February 2009

I ran across another article in regards to a Mary Jane
controversy rocking the Sumo world, this time involving a
soil born Japanese wrestler.

Desperately wanting to come up with yet another hilarious article, my mind
wandered for a few until it hit me, what the hell is Sumo wrestling actually?

I know, a bunch of big men rubbing
wings
in a ring of fire,
but there had to be much more to it, so I began researching.

I immediately ran across the Dolgorsurengiin clan, a group of three
brothers kickin’ ass and taking names across the entire
Eastern Asian region.

From the Blue Wolf to the Blue Dragon, DI will take you on a short journey
into the lives of the real life Blues Brothers.

Dolgorsurengiin Sumiyaabazar, Dolgorsurengiin Serjbudee, and Dolgorsurengiin
Dagvadorj, all Mongolian born and bread, have separately made the family
name a common household word, yet hard as hell to pronounce unless you
are of course Mongolian.

Sumiyaabazar,
the oldest of the Dolgorsurengiin clan, is a high ranking skilled
Mongolian wrestler, proving his worth in the ring of death on several occasions.

Aptly named Blue Steel for this article alone (his other two brothers
use Blue in their nicknames, yet this man is bad enough to
walk around without one), Sum took the Mongolian
wrestling circuit by storm in 2006, snagging the title of Grand Champion from
a field of 1,024 wrestlers.

He had previously finished that tournament in second place four other
times, showing that he can handle himself with the likes of any other.

Mongolian wrestling matches, unlike Sumo, take place in an open field, and
puts sheer strength
to the test, as wrestlers must make their opponents upper body or
elbow come in contact with the ground.

Also, fortunately for my stomach, they do not use G-Strings, as they have
conformed to the much more conservative Speedo look.

Thumbing through pics of the sport, Mongolian wrestlers also differ from
their Japanese counterparts because they look like
Arnold Schwarzenegger on steroids (again).

Serjbudee,
the middle of the road brother, left the life of Mongolian wrestling to make
his professional wrestling debut in Japan in 2001, making him the first from
the Mongolian wrestling circuit to join New Japan Pro Wrestling.

Using the ring name Blue Wolf, Serj proved very early that he was a force
to be reckoned with.

With signature moves such as the Mongol Hammer & Mongol Slam, making even
Bill Goldberg wet his drawers.

Serj also dabbled in the world of Mixed Martial Arts,
making minced meat of Tom Howard in his May 2004 debut.

He has since slipped back into a quiet life, possibly in his home country of Mongolia.

Dag,
the baby of the bunch and by far most successful, sports the competitive
name of Asashoryu in the Japanese Sumo wrestling world.

Haling from Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia, he is already arguably the greatest
Yokozuna ever, a title reserved for the best of the
best that the sport has to offer.

Only 68 other Sumo wrestlers have had the privilege of putting that title
anywhere around their name legally.

He became the first Mongolian to bestow the term Yokozuna in 2003.

At only 28 years of age, his accomplishments are phenomenal to say the least.

Asashoryu brings with him a 598-153-76 career record, 23 grand tournament
victories (five flawless tournament victories with a 15-0 record, two of
them consecutively) putting him on the all time wins list at fourth,
seven consecutive tournament wins, an impressive 84-6 bout record in one fiscal
year (man, if only our mortgage industry could do that), and the Tiger Woods
of Sumo accomplishment of the Grand Slam,
taking by force all six tournaments in one calendar year in 2005.

Tournament record of 15-3 (11-1 during the ’04 & ’05 campaigns) over the
course of a three year period from 2004-2006, bowing out of one of them due
to an injury, and since November of 2002, has an impressive record of 23-15 in
the grand tournaments, with two of the losses coming from a suspension,
and two others due to injuries.

Asashoryu, nicknamed the Blue Dragon, garnished outstanding performances
in the grand tournament three times along with three additional
fighting spirit sticks.

He won his first top division title in just 23 tournaments, matching the
fastest ever to win that title.

He began his career at a very light weight when it comes to the professional
world of men’s thongs, making his career accomplishments even more impressive.

A family tradition that would even make Ghengis Khan
proud to be a Mongolian, these are the real life Blues Brothers that are the
Dolgorsurengiin clan.

So, get out and learn something new for yourself, there is so much
interesting dumb information in the world.

Turn off the T.V. and pick up a book,
or surf the internet using the unbelievable world of Wikipedia or
Dumb Information,
you just may be pleasantly surprised.

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DI Mail Call

Posted in Democrat, Dumbass, Mail Call, Mainstream Media, Movies, Music, Politician, PSA by Chop on 5 February 2009

DI Pride, thank you.

Over the past several days, I have received hundreds of e-mails commenting on
my articles, giving me the much needed inspiration to continue.

Below is just a sample of the e-mail frenzy that DI has taken in, I hope you enjoy.

Q.) “I love your articles, please post some pics of you with no shirt on” –
Deb from Seattle

A.) Deb, I would, but the rest of my fans would most likely hurl, thanks for
the thought anyways

Q.) “Your articles are not only informative, but extremely hilarious, keep up
the good work” Gary from Round Rock, TX

A.) Gary, thanks for those beautiful words, and if you think that my articles
are that damn hilarious, then you are just as screwed up as I am, WOW

Q.) “I never knew someone else was into BBW as much as I am, thanks for
writing that one about Jessica. I am going to show my sis and mom, they
will love it” Bobby from Tulsa

A.) Bobby, I knew there were others out there not scared to love on big women.
Keep filtering out the Medias thoughts in regards to what a woman should look
like; after all, I believe it should be up to the woman in the first place.
But please, for the love of god and all that is holy, do not love that way on
your mom and sister. Thanks for the e-mail and support.

Q.) “Thanks for the article on Pelosi, and thanks for that amazing Pic of her
on the front page” Ron from Los Angeles

A.)Ron, that picture was meant to scare the feathers off of a goose,
but whatever. Thanks for the support, but please keep supporting from very far away.

Q.) “Those public service announcements you guys do are awesome, now I do my
bestest to stay away from train tracks” Lew from Mobile, AL

A.) Lew, thanks for checking out our website, but Jesus, if you needed us to
figure out that you are not supposed to play around moving trains, then maybe
you should, but only after you check us out one more time.

Q.) “Although you are good at what you do, you have no clue what you are
talking about when it comes to PETA. We perform daily the activities needed
to ensure that animals worldwide are treated with dignity and respect, and
the lobster you speak of may now, and only now, live a prosperous life
because of our never ending work. Do more research before you blast us
again” Rhonda from Michigan
Big Rhonda, shut the hell up. Seriously, shut the hell up and get to cookin’
some squirrel
stew woman. Because of your complete idiocy, I have reduced you to pond scum,
but thanks for visiting our site, and please come back.

***NOTE*** no animals were harmed or killed in the making of this article

Q.) “What pole can’t make tea, love writing,” Raj from India

A.) I don’t know if you are referring to a Pollock not being able to make tea,
or if you love my writing so much that you want to do some pole dancing after
snorting some crystallized herbal tea. Whatever the case, it’s great that
you have tuned into our site from the very mysterious yet beautiful country of
India. Keep tuning in and stay away from all the hungry Bengal tigers.

Q.) “Thanks for supporting your troops, its nice to check out the site in
the suck that is Iraq” Chris from Iraq via Fort Hood, TX

A.) Thank you for supporting our site while supporting our site members while
supporting the rest of the free world. Honestly, I pray to god everyday
thanking him for men and women like you, the true Captain America’s. P.S.
Can you send me one of Saddam’s old pure gold shower valves so I
can post it on E-Bay?

DI will in the future post more comments in regards to the influx of e-mail.

Thanks for the support, until next time.