Dumb Information

Dumb Information Nation Revolution

A recent Huffington Post article reveals a churning in the waters of America, a possible Wingnut Revolution in the making as super rich citizens are irate at the new political situation. Doomsday scenarios explained as to who and how the takeover is spelled out, as what is going on in Washington is not the answer. Huffington Post did not receive the memo, put out world wide April 11th 2008; it’s not the Wingnut Revolution, it’s the Dumb Information Nation.
This time, individuals from all parties will unite in the fight against stupidity and greed, the fight to rid the world of hatred and incompetence; it’s not a one sided bashing whether Republican, Democrat, or Independent. The simple thought process that maybe not benefiting me as an individual, it will benefit the masses that stand before and around me.
We do not have to agree on everything out there, but we do have to live together, and no matter who was behind the collapse of this nation, we are all in it together, win or lose (I for one am in it to win it, no matter who I call my Commander-in-Chief, because after all, if I win it, I win it). The recession is not discriminating while washing over the lower and middle class, it chooses no sides. I am not going to lose sleep or divert focus because the gentlemen down the street believes that all criminals regardless of the offense should die of natural causes; there is bigger and more dire concerns at hand.
Simple yet effective thoughts and ideas will get us through the toughest of times, the KISS method if you will.
Keep It Simple Stupid, because all of you have to agree, sometimes ignorance is bliss

Put a Sock in it America

I am sick and tired of hearing all the problems with Obama, Bush, the Democrats, the Republicans, and any other politician that has walked the hallowed grounds of this nation. Mud is flying at a phenomenal rate in regards to the new Obama four year term, just as it flew during an eight year Bush stint at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.
Die hard elephants are attacking Obama on everything from the stimulus package to leaving the seat down while urinating, and most completely lock their thought patterns up when debates start in respect to how his presidency has started.
Die hard jackasses are still attacking Bush and Cheney for their eight year tenure in the White House, and when ideas are exchanged about why they did some of the things that they did, they lock up all thought processes quicker than a bowel movement after eating spicy curry with coffee on a hot summer day.
Republicans secretly despise Democrats, and Democrats loathe Republicans behind closed doors. This has gone on since the dawn of democracy in America, since the split of all parties, and since men were given the ability to think for themselves with a little assistance from the mass media.
Backyard barbecues and middle of the day water cooler discussions have created fight after fight on whose party has the best and smartest candidate, and whose party is the savior of the country.
Now, after the force feeding of the nearly $1 Trillion stimulus package, Obama and his followers are working on yet another stimulus package to try and inject some sort of life into this breathless country. Every under the radar website and media outlet is slamming him for his super duper top secret spending plans, and throwing him under any and every bus they see because he is doing exactly what he said he would before he was elected.
I pounded the pavement to get the first hand taste in the mouths of the masses, with astounding results.
“Honestly, I am tired of listening to all the crap about all of this. I don’t even want to turn on T.V. or the internet for fear of seeing something else negative about America,” stated one individual. (All names have been omitted to protect the innocent and weak)
“Obama has yet to show me he knows how to run a country. He has slammed through a huge stimulus package without letting the public see what was in it,” claimed another bystander very eager to voice his distaste with the newly elected President.
“He closed Gitmo without even looking at who was in it, where are all of those criminals going to go now,” asked yet another.
“He is the savior of the country, he will do things to help us all,” claimed another, but when asked what things, could not come up with any.
Before I go into my views on this controversial subject, let’s look at the facts.
Obama stated in his campaign that he would push through a massive stimulus package after taking oath; he did.
Obama promised to close Guantanamo Bay, Cuba while beating the trail for President; he has.
He has moved swiftly to try and solve the nations most critical issues, love him or hate him, those are facts.
Some staunch Republicans are now claiming issues with his character, but can not come up with any concrete evidence of wrongdoing yet. Researching the true meaning of character, I found that Wikipedia states “attributes including the existence or lack of virtues such as integrity, courage, fortitude, honesty, and loyalty, or of good behaviors or habits.”
Here are my thoughts reader, love them or hate them.
Obama has done what he said he would during his campaign, whether or not we like it. His massive spending package is the largest of all time, but took even larger balls and intestinal fortitude to make it happen. I don’t personally agree with some of the inserts of the package, but it’s not my country, it’s our country.
He has ordered the closure of Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, just like he said he would. Prisoners are being released either due to lack of hard evidence or no evidence of wrong doing at all, which is something that is backed in our U.S. Constitution, words that are thrown around only out of convenience to the situation at hand. No person shall be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law, as stated in the law of the land. Hardened criminals in Gitmo that have lengthy lists of wrongdoings will be transferred somewhere else, not given a pardon. It’s a change in venue for those who need to stay behind bars, that’s it; but because Obama declared it, it’s a problem.
Because Bush started it at Gitmo, it was a problem. The Donkeys hated Bush with everything they had, so no matter what decision he made, it was the wrong one. The Elephants hate Obama with everything they have, so every decision he makes will be the wrong one.
Hatred is a disease, and that disease has spread faster than the likes of AIDS and cancer combined. It is a highly contagious disease, and affects human brain functions. It allows people to judge others based on such things as skin color, what kind of clothes they wear, and what they eat for breakfast. Hatred is a disease that could wipe out mankind, due to differences that are very minute when it comes to importance based on what is going on around us. We can agree to disagree on every issue in the world, but must find a common thread that will allow us to continue as a civilized planet.
I don’t agree with most of the things that Obama is trying, but at least he is trying something. He is not sitting back and hoping for the best, he is attacking to try and fix a half century of wrong that we have done to ourselves. He has the courage to bet his second term on the stimulus that he pushed for, which shows as much for character as anything else; intestinal fortitude, strength, courage, honesty. Like him or not, he is our president, and deserves the respect of at least the position he holds, just as Bush did and Clinton, Bush, and Reagan before them.
America needs to grow up and find the common thread that will allow us to forge ahead through the toughest times the living has seen. Without that common thread, we are all doomed to fail, both individually and as a nation.

C.E.C.

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Pimp Hand of Al Swearingin: Coke VS. Pepsi

Posted in 2nd Amendment, Advertising, Conspiracy, diet, Drinking, Drugs, guns, Mainstream Media, Media, Obama, TV by Chop on 14 February 2009

How long have we as a human race had to endure ads on the Coke vs. Pepsi controversy? Every time I turn on the radio, or change the channel, or walk out of my bathroom after a nice reading of Money, Popular Science or Mental_Floss magazine, the duel to the death hits me in the face. Since the early ‘70’s (yeah I am that old but still can kick your ass), the media has forced us to swallow this fight without the refreshment of swallowing the product. Pepsi is the greatest, no Coke is the greatest, no wait, it just maybe RC Cola, just kidding, its either Pepsi or Coke, are we clear. I, the Honorable Al Swearingin, aim to end this battle once and for all.
There is no comparison, period, and I am sick of some freak boy with a microphone telling me that there is. For those of you who really take this seriously, I will set the record straight once and for all.
Pepsi’s advertising ploy through the years has been based solely off of preference instead of the facts, the true taste and feeling of slamming back a carbonated can in the middle of a hot summer day. As for myself, I will drink either product, but do however strongly prefer Coke over Pepsi, not because of the taste, but because of the feeling that a Coke gives that no other Cola can, no pun intended. I am sure that most of the nation agrees with me that neither product tastes that bad, but prefer one over the other. Like me, if you are a die hard Pepsi fanatic, if you opened the fridge on a Sunday afternoon looking for a quick swig of a carbonated drink and found only the dreaded Coke, you would pull it out and pop the top quicker than Obama nominations duck and run.
To give it a fighting chance, the PR writers at Pepsi Company have made the ads all about the taste, preference over facts. Hey, I can’t blame them; they learned that tactic from the mainstream media. But facts speak for themselves, facts that show that Coke has had the upper hand since the birth of Christ. Pepsi is all bark and no bite, and Coke has the bite, or sting, or kick in the ass that the rest of the class lacks. Its not about taste, it’s about the sting, as Mohammed Ali said it best, “float like a butterfly, sting like a bee.” Nothing, except for maybe a viewing of your 401K statement, stings like Coke.
The purity of the feeling of a Coke rolling down the back of your throat on a hot summer day, the freakishly satisfying stinging sensation that it gives you, is truly amazing. No other carbonated product can give you that sensation, putting Coke head and shoulders above the competition. By the way, if any of you Coke advertisement gurus are reading this, and it winds up in some ad in Bakersfield, California, I am coming for my money; why you haven’t realized this as a selling tool is beyond me. Everyone knows it’s about the sting, Coke is gonna sting going down, and for some reason, its all good.
Take it from me, Al Swearingin, if you like the refreshing sting of a carbonated masterpiece, drink Coke. Now it’s settled, so stop advertising on my T.V.
Until next time the God fearin’ science lovin’ gun totin’ badass says believe in God, have a good time, and make sure you have plenty of ammo.

A Letter to Congress

When I was first asked to take on this project, I was bombarded with information, letters, and directives immediately. I washed much to the side to try and keep my head above water, passing on many opportunities to present the world with the other side of the story, or stories in our case. For that, I apologize. But, with a stroke of luck, I have resurrected something very interesting and deserving of a post on our site. Please read and enjoy the below letter to a congressman.

Dear Congressman (name has been omitted per request),
I am writing this in reference to the increased amount of troops publically refusing to deploy to a war that they feel is unethical and immoral. I am a civilian contractor currently deployed in Iraq, and have spent the last 3 ½ years overseas. At no time have I witnessed a stronger force, a stronger will, a stronger determination than I have in the time spent in this country. The American military has been given orders to deploy, orders to fight and eradicate an insurgency that has bullied and terrorized a nation, and a hand full of individuals are standing up against the government that has given them the freedom to do so. No matter what the issue at hand, no matter the reason for an occupation of foreign soil, the cold reality is that the soldiers, airmen, marines, and seamen held up their hands, took an oath to stand between their families, fellow countrymen, and the enemy, both foreign and domestic.
It has always been the few that make it to the forefront of the media, the few that are held up and claimed heroes. Ones that defy their leadership, defy their government, defy even the simple thought of responsibility, which are forced in front of the couches and computers of modern day America.
“A month after US army reservist Matthis Chiroux publicly refused to deploy to Iraq, the former sergeant on Sunday set himself up for possible prosecution by failing to report for active duty with his unit in South Carolina,” quoted from Yahoo News.
My request, sir, is that I may take his place, or the place of Lt. Watada, to serve along side their once fellow soldiers, so that they have the extra set of eyes that could enable them to return safely to their always waiting families back home. What I want from life is the ability to show my daughters the good in man, not what is on the T.V. every night, portraying military men and women as oil thieves and rapists. Reality in pictures and words showing what the men and women of the Armed Forces do on a daily basis; repairing damaged dams, water pipelines, sewer treatment plants, constructing new schools and hospitals, delivering food to starving families world wide from someone that I hope and pray they trust, their daddy.
I have learned to realize that I can not change the world, but I can change the world of my children, a world in their eyes free of hate, free of violence, free of discrimination, free of starvation. A world created because of the hard work and sacrifice of the American Soldier driving an MRAP vehicle down a hostile street in Mosul, the American Airmen refueling a B-52 on Diego Garcia bound for the Middle East to provide air support for the ground troops, the American Seaman who guides in a F-18 on a wobbly deck in the Persian Gulf, and the American Marine who sleeps in a sand pit in the Anbar Province, taking incoming nearly as often as beads of sweat roll off his face.
I am not requesting this for fame, or public praise, only to join the likes of the true heroes of America’s modern day. I am officially requesting a waiver to join the ranks of the few, so that I too can defend this nation, my family, and the freedom of so many others worldwide.

Sincerely,
Name omitted per request

Sir, thank you for your dedication and love for your, I mean our, country.

The Blue Brothers

Posted in Asia, diet, Health, Japan, Medical, Mongolia, Sport by Chop on 6 February 2009

I ran across another article in regards to a Mary Jane
controversy rocking the Sumo world, this time involving a
soil born Japanese wrestler.

Desperately wanting to come up with yet another hilarious article, my mind
wandered for a few until it hit me, what the hell is Sumo wrestling actually?

I know, a bunch of big men rubbing
wings
in a ring of fire,
but there had to be much more to it, so I began researching.

I immediately ran across the Dolgorsurengiin clan, a group of three
brothers kickin’ ass and taking names across the entire
Eastern Asian region.

From the Blue Wolf to the Blue Dragon, DI will take you on a short journey
into the lives of the real life Blues Brothers.

Dolgorsurengiin Sumiyaabazar, Dolgorsurengiin Serjbudee, and Dolgorsurengiin
Dagvadorj, all Mongolian born and bread, have separately made the family
name a common household word, yet hard as hell to pronounce unless you
are of course Mongolian.

Sumiyaabazar,
the oldest of the Dolgorsurengiin clan, is a high ranking skilled
Mongolian wrestler, proving his worth in the ring of death on several occasions.

Aptly named Blue Steel for this article alone (his other two brothers
use Blue in their nicknames, yet this man is bad enough to
walk around without one), Sum took the Mongolian
wrestling circuit by storm in 2006, snagging the title of Grand Champion from
a field of 1,024 wrestlers.

He had previously finished that tournament in second place four other
times, showing that he can handle himself with the likes of any other.

Mongolian wrestling matches, unlike Sumo, take place in an open field, and
puts sheer strength
to the test, as wrestlers must make their opponents upper body or
elbow come in contact with the ground.

Also, fortunately for my stomach, they do not use G-Strings, as they have
conformed to the much more conservative Speedo look.

Thumbing through pics of the sport, Mongolian wrestlers also differ from
their Japanese counterparts because they look like
Arnold Schwarzenegger on steroids (again).

Serjbudee,
the middle of the road brother, left the life of Mongolian wrestling to make
his professional wrestling debut in Japan in 2001, making him the first from
the Mongolian wrestling circuit to join New Japan Pro Wrestling.

Using the ring name Blue Wolf, Serj proved very early that he was a force
to be reckoned with.

With signature moves such as the Mongol Hammer & Mongol Slam, making even
Bill Goldberg wet his drawers.

Serj also dabbled in the world of Mixed Martial Arts,
making minced meat of Tom Howard in his May 2004 debut.

He has since slipped back into a quiet life, possibly in his home country of Mongolia.

Dag,
the baby of the bunch and by far most successful, sports the competitive
name of Asashoryu in the Japanese Sumo wrestling world.

Haling from Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia, he is already arguably the greatest
Yokozuna ever, a title reserved for the best of the
best that the sport has to offer.

Only 68 other Sumo wrestlers have had the privilege of putting that title
anywhere around their name legally.

He became the first Mongolian to bestow the term Yokozuna in 2003.

At only 28 years of age, his accomplishments are phenomenal to say the least.

Asashoryu brings with him a 598-153-76 career record, 23 grand tournament
victories (five flawless tournament victories with a 15-0 record, two of
them consecutively) putting him on the all time wins list at fourth,
seven consecutive tournament wins, an impressive 84-6 bout record in one fiscal
year (man, if only our mortgage industry could do that), and the Tiger Woods
of Sumo accomplishment of the Grand Slam,
taking by force all six tournaments in one calendar year in 2005.

Tournament record of 15-3 (11-1 during the ’04 & ’05 campaigns) over the
course of a three year period from 2004-2006, bowing out of one of them due
to an injury, and since November of 2002, has an impressive record of 23-15 in
the grand tournaments, with two of the losses coming from a suspension,
and two others due to injuries.

Asashoryu, nicknamed the Blue Dragon, garnished outstanding performances
in the grand tournament three times along with three additional
fighting spirit sticks.

He won his first top division title in just 23 tournaments, matching the
fastest ever to win that title.

He began his career at a very light weight when it comes to the professional
world of men’s thongs, making his career accomplishments even more impressive.

A family tradition that would even make Ghengis Khan
proud to be a Mongolian, these are the real life Blues Brothers that are the
Dolgorsurengiin clan.

So, get out and learn something new for yourself, there is so much
interesting dumb information in the world.

Turn off the T.V. and pick up a book,
or surf the internet using the unbelievable world of Wikipedia or
Dumb Information,
you just may be pleasantly surprised.