Molotov Cocktail

A recent article from a Berkeley, California genius claims that the United States should act now on the impending oil crisis of the future, raising gas prices to an across the board minimum of at least $4 per gallon to help wean us from the dependency on oil. If the fair market price of oil was for arguments sake $1.50 per gallon, then the government would pocket $2.50 to store away into a slush fund to pay for mass transit projects, stimulus packages, and bailed out mortgage company parties hosted by Nickelback.
“Consumers will gripe, but they’ll soon find solace in the reliable, affordable buses and trains they’ll ride when gas prices soar beyond reach. For low-income individuals who would truly suffer as a result of such a policy, a payroll tax offset or refundable tax credit can ease the burden,” the article states to sooth our fear of having to sit next to some serial killer on the subway.
Hey college grad genius, I am not in the low-income bracket, and seriously felt the pinch of nearly $4 per gallon of gas when the oil companies were sticking it up my family’s tailpipe. But because I slave for a six figure income, I will not be eligible for a tax offset to ease my pain.
I am tired of carrying the less fortunate with my tax dollars, which by the way keep getting increased on what seems like an hourly basis now. I struggled through high school, struggled through my early 20’s, and worked my nuts off to get to where I am at, with every other individual having either the same chances if not better to get to where I am at, and have to sit back and carry them to financial independence, all the while allowing you the severely over-educated to impose domestic working man tariffs so that you can move closer to your political goals of oil independence or toilet paper independence.
Well, here it is. I, the working man of the United States, say stick the minimum gas price and meter in my car tax for every mile driven and whatever else you want to stick my paycheck tax and shove it up your tailpipe. Just when we see some light at the end of the tunnel, you go and turn it off, just to turn it on when we are down and out, and when we have hope again, you turn it off. The extra $400 in my pocket to help stimulate the economy will buy me about five tanks of gas, helping only the already rich oil companies and distributors. If that kind of education is what a college degree gets you, I want no part of it.

A.E.

Unbiased Media Works Hard to Sway your Opinion

Binyam Mohamed is finally going home, or the last home he legally had, back in Britain. His stay in Guantanamo Bay is nearing its end, as British doctors have reviewed his condition and tagged him as fit to fly.
“A newspaper has reported that the Foreign Office solicited a letter from the US State Department that forced British judges to block publication of evidence of torture,” is how the article ended conveniently. Something to make the reader wonder, possibly ponder on for hours on end. Was there actually torture going on worlds away? Did they actually rub red paint on people’s faces to try and get them to talk?
Facts, much to the chagrin of the mainstream media, speak louder than rumors or gossip. But they know exactly when to throw in the bait, just when to add the possibility of something or where in the article to insert the maybe it actually happened to create a thinking tornado for the reader. The mainstream media has honed its skills over the course of the last century, and is as close to perfection as possible, possibly.
The hard facts are thrown in for this story, such as Mohamed being an Ethiopian Muslim convert who was granted asylum in Britain in 1994. He was also arrested in Pakistan in 2002 on “suspicion of involvement in terrorism.”
Once an Ethiopian slash British immigrant, he was in Pakistan during an American led campaign to rid that area of insurgency. He was in a region of the world that had severe travel warnings from Israel to Jamaica. He was caught up in a Taliban led area of Pakistan, in an area of the world that had been war torn for centuries. Government issued travel warnings, both U.S. and Britain, told him not to go, yet he did anyhow. He was caught up in a war, those are the facts.
Throw in what ever else you like to provide the “fat” of the article; I do it as well, but only to poke fun at something or to try and evoke a quick laugh. Rumors to try and make the reader wander in their thinking are something else; it’s what most would call propaganda, which is information being disseminated aimed at influencing the opinions or behaviors of the intended audience.
Propaganda is the deliberate, systematic attempt to shape perceptions, manipulate cognitions, and direct behavior to achieve a response that furthers the desired intent of the propagandist.
—Garth S. Jowett and Victoria O’Donnell, Propaganda and Persuasion

Well, we here at Dumb Information believe that the reader has a brain of his or her own, and have the ability to decide for themselves what is in front of them. We will continue to provide you with real world problems, throw in our two cents to try and pull out a smile or two, and let you decide. It’s up to you, now go out there and make your mind up.
Some analysts claim that Mohamed will be one of the many that end up back in the war zone assisting either the Taliban or some other insurgency based organization, crap I just did it didn’t I. Sorry, it possibly won’t happen again.

Wake Up America

Wake up America.
Death threats, angry e-mails, and nasty letters have been sent to the new mother of octuplets, as the state may have to foot either most or all of the bills from the birth and care of the eight premature babies, a total that could run close to $1.3 million and change. Taxpayers are irate at the fact that they may have to reach into their pocketbooks to assist for the mounting health care costs. The taxpayer’s main concern: Nadya Suleman is unemployed, and was already the mother of six, three of which receive monthly disability checks from the government. She paid for in vitro fertilization, which enabled her to bear eight children at once, most of the financial backing coming from an on the job injury claim she states. The question that I ask is this; what sets her apart from the rest of the nation that utilize government funding to pay the bills other than the amount of children she has?
She receives food stamps, and will get a raise thanks to the new Stimulus plan passed by Congress. So will everyone else on welfare or government assisted funding, so I ask again what makes her stand out from the rest? DI’s answer, simply nothing.
It may very well be the history leading up to the birth of her eight new babies, or it’s the ever sinking economy that has ruffled the feathers of the taxpayer in the Golden State of California. What ever the case, the fact is that the taxpayer has been footing the bills of millions just like Ms. Suleman for the past three plus decades.
The newly revised Stimulus plan aids situations just like this, as people who currently receive food stamps, some 30 million currently, will get more, people receiving social supplementary income, will get a one time stimulus injection of $250 each, while cash depleted states will get massive injections to continue funding such programs as Medicaid.
Suleman is not alone; she is no different than a majority of individuals that walk to the mailbox to receive a monthly stimulus check to pay the bills. There is nothing that sets her apart from millions upon millions of others across our country, so leave her alone.
If you want to do something about her situation, attack the system. Vote for politicians that oppose systems and programs that you only know of now because you have lifted your blinders. You voted for this, or the mass around you did, now get out and pound the streets to change it. Change is not just a word, it’s an action as in the act of doing something, and with the power of the vote people can begin to see that action. If you don’t like how your politicians are running your small world, then work to get them voted out.
The answer is not to threaten the lives of people like Ms. Suleman; the answer is to change the system that they benefit from. As in several of my earlier articles, if someone really desperately needs the help, then by all means let’s help them. My only issue is when some 26 year old strapping man walks to the mailbox to collect his $625 a month plus his now $250 one time stimulus check and he has yet to try and find a job or pay taxes. I, however, have not sent death threats to that man, but voted to put in office politicians that agreed with my beliefs in welfare and government assistance.
America, wake up and figure out what is going on around you. It should not take a recession near depression to find out that this is going on, albeit not to the scale of Ms. Suleman, but compounded 30 million or so times over. It should not take the over exposure from the media, in this particular case, to show you what the government funds on a monthly basis. Do the research for yourself; the information is free in most cases. Do what you need to do to fix the world that surrounds you, but do it with pride and dignity, not only for yourself, but those around you.
“If we open a quarrel between the past and present, we shall find that we have lost the future,” Winston Churchill. We can only move forward from today with all the tools that are available to us. If you don’t like how your government is acting, say something, do something, but not to Ms. Suleman, because she is doing exactly what the government is allowing her to do.

A Letter to Congress

When I was first asked to take on this project, I was bombarded with information, letters, and directives immediately. I washed much to the side to try and keep my head above water, passing on many opportunities to present the world with the other side of the story, or stories in our case. For that, I apologize. But, with a stroke of luck, I have resurrected something very interesting and deserving of a post on our site. Please read and enjoy the below letter to a congressman.

Dear Congressman (name has been omitted per request),
I am writing this in reference to the increased amount of troops publically refusing to deploy to a war that they feel is unethical and immoral. I am a civilian contractor currently deployed in Iraq, and have spent the last 3 ½ years overseas. At no time have I witnessed a stronger force, a stronger will, a stronger determination than I have in the time spent in this country. The American military has been given orders to deploy, orders to fight and eradicate an insurgency that has bullied and terrorized a nation, and a hand full of individuals are standing up against the government that has given them the freedom to do so. No matter what the issue at hand, no matter the reason for an occupation of foreign soil, the cold reality is that the soldiers, airmen, marines, and seamen held up their hands, took an oath to stand between their families, fellow countrymen, and the enemy, both foreign and domestic.
It has always been the few that make it to the forefront of the media, the few that are held up and claimed heroes. Ones that defy their leadership, defy their government, defy even the simple thought of responsibility, which are forced in front of the couches and computers of modern day America.
“A month after US army reservist Matthis Chiroux publicly refused to deploy to Iraq, the former sergeant on Sunday set himself up for possible prosecution by failing to report for active duty with his unit in South Carolina,” quoted from Yahoo News.
My request, sir, is that I may take his place, or the place of Lt. Watada, to serve along side their once fellow soldiers, so that they have the extra set of eyes that could enable them to return safely to their always waiting families back home. What I want from life is the ability to show my daughters the good in man, not what is on the T.V. every night, portraying military men and women as oil thieves and rapists. Reality in pictures and words showing what the men and women of the Armed Forces do on a daily basis; repairing damaged dams, water pipelines, sewer treatment plants, constructing new schools and hospitals, delivering food to starving families world wide from someone that I hope and pray they trust, their daddy.
I have learned to realize that I can not change the world, but I can change the world of my children, a world in their eyes free of hate, free of violence, free of discrimination, free of starvation. A world created because of the hard work and sacrifice of the American Soldier driving an MRAP vehicle down a hostile street in Mosul, the American Airmen refueling a B-52 on Diego Garcia bound for the Middle East to provide air support for the ground troops, the American Seaman who guides in a F-18 on a wobbly deck in the Persian Gulf, and the American Marine who sleeps in a sand pit in the Anbar Province, taking incoming nearly as often as beads of sweat roll off his face.
I am not requesting this for fame, or public praise, only to join the likes of the true heroes of America’s modern day. I am officially requesting a waiver to join the ranks of the few, so that I too can defend this nation, my family, and the freedom of so many others worldwide.

Sincerely,
Name omitted per request

Sir, thank you for your dedication and love for your, I mean our, country.

The B-52’s

You all must be growing tired of the same old thing, I know. It is hard to watch, or hear, or read the same thing over and over and over without wanting to slit your own wrists just to make the pain go away. Though as for that the passing there had worn them really about the same, as Robert Frost so eloquently put it. DI heard your cries, and took action. Our Hall of Fame inductee, although possessing many human characteristics, is not of this world. It was born from the imagination; it was born of steel and bolts, and became the greatest in its class, far outliving the competition, and still remains active to this day.
With absolutely no introduction required, I present to you the B-52, and I am not talking about the “Love Shack” one. The Boeing B-52 Stratofortress, nicknamed BUFF for being big, ugly, fat, with the last F being silent, sort of (feller for all you southern folks). The Strato rolled off of the production line ready for action in 1955, giving the American Air Force a deep offensive jet powered threat unheard of at the time.
General Nathan Twining, Air Force Chief of Staff from 1953 to 1957, said it best as “the long rifle was the great weapon of its day……Today this B-52 is the long rifle of the air age.” General, if you could hear us today in 2009, it would be the exact same thing, as the B-52 is still alive and flying high. The United States Military, over the course of the past century, has made costly purchases that never panned out, but got there monies worth and more with the old faithful Strato.
The B-52, among other things, is a veteran of several foreign conflicts, to include Vietnam and the Gulf War. In February of 1991 in support of the Gulf War, Barksdale AFB in Northwest Louisiana launched a pack of B-52’s which flew a nonstop combat mission, at the time the longest in history, striking targets inside Iraq. 14,000 miles and 35 hours later, the B-52’s touched down safely back at Barksdale. The B-52 holds the current record of the longest combat mission of 16,000 miles, a mission from Guam to Iraq and back to deliver critical blows to Baghdad power stations in support of Operation Desert Strike.
The Stratofortress has also outlived several of its replacements like the XB-70 and the B-1 Lancer. Mission after mission, the Strato’s performance far exceeded the rest of the pack, proving that age is not necessarily a bad thing. It is one of only five aircraft to have to have 50 consecutive years of service, with a projected future until at least 2040, which would give it an astounding 85 years terrorizing the skies of America’s enemies.
Far outclassed and outran by its want to be successors, the B-52’s mission readiness rates have hovered around the 80% mark, showing the B-1 Lancer (53%) and B-2 Spirit (26%) who the true giant of the sky is.
Most Buff’s in the current fleet are twice as old as the pilots who fly them, with the possibility of one day the men and women who call the beast home for hours at a time could affectionately refer to them as Grandma and Grandpa. A true hero and deserving HOF member, welcome aboard aircraft commander of the skies.
And last but not least, the B-52’s popularity across the nation resulted in a the naming of a viciously strong strain of marijuana, a multi layered cocktail shooter including Baileys Irish Cream, as well as the hit rock band B-52’s, being named for the shape of a beehive hairdo resembling the nose cone of the air king.
DI Pride, until next time; do you own research, and form your own opinions.

The Land of Opportunity… if You Aren’t Poor

Different political party in power, same old outcome; a Democratic stacked Washington D.C. now has taxpayers on the edge of their seats with the price tag on the economic stimulus eclipsing $900 billion. Turns out big corporations profit because of politicians, no matter what party affiliation, after the sinking auto ship earned a possible short lived victory as new car buyers can claim a tax deduction on sales tax and interest paid.
Also nicely and recently tucked into the massive package is nearly $6.5 billion for the politically popular National Institutes on Health, approved by both Democrats and Republicans, showing that both sides can agree on spending taxpayer’s money foolishly in these trying times.
In what is turning out to be a blood fest on Capital Hill, both sides are starting to show what they are made of, to include Democrats trying to sneak in tax breaks for movie producers, and Republicans pushing for a massive tax credit for new home buyers while the economy and job market continue to tank.
Most Americans are deeply concerned that the bill has jumped nearly $100 billion in just under a month, sparking serious controversy, as layoffs and unemployment claims skyrocket at a record pace.
“Nothing seems to be safe anymore, and our elected officials want to give tax credits to wealthy movie producers, what a crying shame,” stated one unhappy Republican bystander.
“I don’t know who to trust anymore, as my party has been telling me that only the GOP is for big business. Now we are going to continue to cave when it comes to the auto giants, I just want to move to Canada,” hollered a most likely once-Democratic faithful nearby.
“Tough times require tough measures, meaning that maybe $900 billion of taxpayer’s money fueling research genetics tests and big corporation’s tax breaks is not the answer. What we need to do as a nation is sit down and think this one out, creating a deep DOD and government work pool based off of weak economy with very little incoming tax money is not a wise choice, what we need is private businesses and corporations fueling the job surge so the taxpayer does not have to foot another bill,” claimed a DI employee sitting on the couch eating Funyuns. “Get rid of the unions, get rid of illegal immigration, start making everyone pay taxes to include government employees, that includes you Tom Daschle, get rid of the free government carpet ride that is an endless supply of checks for producing nothing in return, and stop funding stupid stuff like studies to find what a watermelon does at sun type temperatures, and we as a nation will have a fighting chance.

Then, and only then, will we be able to afford to live in America.”

DI Hall of Fame

Your beloved DI staff (truth be told just me), after much deliberation, has picked the next class of inductees for the exclusive DI Hall of Fame. All right, I used my DI presidential authority in this induction process, so the blame is all mine if it goes south. These few individuals have over the years received a bad rap from most of the homophobic populace due to their sexual orientation, or hint at sexual orientation, or the fact that they based their entire careers off of “assisting men that are comfortable with their own sexuality to get in women’s pants faster” kind of music. As I may not personally agree with what some of them do on their own time, I do have the upmost respect for their professional careers, which has produced some of the greatest music our generation will ever have the privilege of listening to. No matter what they do behind closed doors at night, what they have done for the music industry is warrant enough for induction into our HOF.

Barry Manilow – duel entry, as Barry is famous on two different playing fields. First and foremost, Mr. Manilow the singer/songwriter/musician/kick ass entertainer performed greats such as Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head, Cant Help Falling in Love, Cant Take my Eyes off You, and remade the Righteous Brothers You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feelin’, just another reason that made Top Gun an all time great candidate. Joined the ranks of Frank Sinatra, Michael Jackson, and Johnny Mathis as the only entertainers to have five, count em five, albums on the best selling charts at the same time. Manilow also assisted in the clean up of Hurricane Katrina , matching dollar for dollar his fans donations to the American Red Cross. Once pissed off Donald Trump, skipping on an event and keeping the front money for nearly a month, which shows that this dude isn’t scared of much. Next, Barry Manilow also starred in the hit movie Road Trip a hilarious comedy about all kinds of dumb crap. Barry got bit in the hand by a boa constrictor, grabbed his bum several times on camera, and made out with a freakishly hot red head near the closing credits. Barry/Barry, welcome to the Hall of Fame.

Elton John – arguably the greatest performer of all time, definitely in the same league as the likes of Michael Jackson, David Lee Roth & Tom Hanks, John has tuned his vocal chords in order to make the sweet sounds of instant classics (Goodbye Yellow Brick Road, Bennie and the Jets, Rocket Man, Candle in the Wind, Daniel, I Guess That’s Why They call it the Blues, I’m Still Standing, Honky Cat, Tiny Dancer, Someone Saved my Life Tonight, we could go on all night); assisted in the writing portion for the songs in the ’94 kids classic The Lion King (honestly, how many of you heard or knew what Hakuna Matata meant before Mr. John gave you that sample). This is not the first HOF nod for Elton, as he is a deserving member of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and the Songwriters Hall of Fame. John also established the Elton John AIDS Foundation, pumping in a considerable amount of his own dough to assist in the worldwide fight of the deadly disease. And last but certainly not least, you must address him by the title Sir , as John was knighted by the monarch of England showing his true kickassness.

Neil Diamond – chosen for not only his superior vocals and performance characteristics, but he is also the reason for a pretty good flick in Saving Silverman, a movie about three grown men infatuated with the legendary singer/performer/kick ass entertainer. Provided the introduction for Elton John’s first American soil concert, one of the other inductees. Personally looks like he could hold his own in a bar fight, making him the man of this induction class. Inducted into the Songwriters Hall of Fame in ’84, which may be a little more special than this one, but we wont hold that against him. His music is responsible for such great things as the theme song for the Red Sox Nation (even though he cheers for the wrong New York City baseball team, go Mets), soundtrack additions to “one of the greatest kick ass movies ever” Pulp Fiction, and inspired UB 40 to actually create something that would stick in Red Red Wine. Absolute classics such as Sweet Caroline, Oh Mary, and Evermore are just a taste of what Mr. Diamond in the rough of the music industry gave to us.

While these men do not possess qualities such as Chuck Norris or Rambo, they have displayed such qualities deserving the ultimate recognition, the introduction into the DI HOF. Welcome, and enjoy the company.