Dumb Information

Planet Earth’s BFF

Posted in Advertising, Dumbass, Mainstream Media, Media, Movies by Chop on 3 March 2009

He is known by a simple picture of his left side and face. Not an athlete, politician, or film star, yet he is popular throughout the world, 231 countries or geographical locations strong. He is Planet Earths BFF (Best Friend Forever).
His name is Tom Anderson, which is about all that most know of him, except for the posted bulletins showing interest in new songs or videos. If you glance over his home page on MySpace, you can see that he has kept it somewhat simple while creating one of the most popular friendship networks the world has ever seen. Most pages are fancy, laid out, and have elaborate color and design schemes, yet his models a starter page for a newbie to the MySpace faction.
His creation has sparked curiosity, imagination, and desire as ordinary people such as me can reach out and find the likes of Mookie Wilson or Bill Goldberg, Stone Cold Steve Austin or George Bush, Sr. We can send a friend request, and anxiously await a response. We can see what Barack Obama is up to, and then thumb through videos of Wrestle Mania on the same website. It is an inevitable avalanche, gaining popularity and steam on what seems like an hourly basis.
From personal experience, I must have felt the void in my life that was left by the likes of missing out on MySpace when I created the Dumb Information site. I began to toy with the front page, and felt the undying urge to browse old friends that I had lost contact with several years ago. I have never been big into rekindling old friendships, as they died for a reason, but could not control MySelf. Page after page, I clicked on pictures of old high school football buddies, old work associates, and occasionally superstars such as the greatest hair band of all time Poison, which by the way is Dumb Information’s friend. Days melted into nights, nights blended into days, and a week went by, forgetting to sleep for the most part and skip meals just to see if someone had accepted my friendship request.
I have now built my friend base up from being a solitary hermit to around 30, with several requests pending. My friend list includes the likes of Poison, Vanilla Ice Ice Baby, the Entire Shreveport Bossier Captains baseball organization, three other bands, a church, and several old running buddies that I haven’t talked to in more than 10 years. All of this is possible, without having to leave the comfort of my reclining office chair, amazing.
His name is Tom Anderson, and he is my friend (along with 258,433,070 others).

Wake Up America

Posted in Democrat, Dumbass, Health, IRS, Mainstream Media, Media, Politician, rant, Stimulus Plan, Tax, Welfare by Chop on 16 February 2009

Wake up America.
Death threats, angry e-mails, and nasty letters have been sent to the new mother of octuplets, as the state may have to foot either most or all of the bills from the birth and care of the eight premature babies, a total that could run close to $1.3 million and change. Taxpayers are irate at the fact that they may have to reach into their pocketbooks to assist for the mounting health care costs. The taxpayer’s main concern: Nadya Suleman is unemployed, and was already the mother of six, three of which receive monthly disability checks from the government. She paid for in vitro fertilization, which enabled her to bear eight children at once, most of the financial backing coming from an on the job injury claim she states. The question that I ask is this; what sets her apart from the rest of the nation that utilize government funding to pay the bills other than the amount of children she has?
She receives food stamps, and will get a raise thanks to the new Stimulus plan passed by Congress. So will everyone else on welfare or government assisted funding, so I ask again what makes her stand out from the rest? DI’s answer, simply nothing.
It may very well be the history leading up to the birth of her eight new babies, or it’s the ever sinking economy that has ruffled the feathers of the taxpayer in the Golden State of California. What ever the case, the fact is that the taxpayer has been footing the bills of millions just like Ms. Suleman for the past three plus decades.
The newly revised Stimulus plan aids situations just like this, as people who currently receive food stamps, some 30 million currently, will get more, people receiving social supplementary income, will get a one time stimulus injection of $250 each, while cash depleted states will get massive injections to continue funding such programs as Medicaid.
Suleman is not alone; she is no different than a majority of individuals that walk to the mailbox to receive a monthly stimulus check to pay the bills. There is nothing that sets her apart from millions upon millions of others across our country, so leave her alone.
If you want to do something about her situation, attack the system. Vote for politicians that oppose systems and programs that you only know of now because you have lifted your blinders. You voted for this, or the mass around you did, now get out and pound the streets to change it. Change is not just a word, it’s an action as in the act of doing something, and with the power of the vote people can begin to see that action. If you don’t like how your politicians are running your small world, then work to get them voted out.
The answer is not to threaten the lives of people like Ms. Suleman; the answer is to change the system that they benefit from. As in several of my earlier articles, if someone really desperately needs the help, then by all means let’s help them. My only issue is when some 26 year old strapping man walks to the mailbox to collect his $625 a month plus his now $250 one time stimulus check and he has yet to try and find a job or pay taxes. I, however, have not sent death threats to that man, but voted to put in office politicians that agreed with my beliefs in welfare and government assistance.
America, wake up and figure out what is going on around you. It should not take a recession near depression to find out that this is going on, albeit not to the scale of Ms. Suleman, but compounded 30 million or so times over. It should not take the over exposure from the media, in this particular case, to show you what the government funds on a monthly basis. Do the research for yourself; the information is free in most cases. Do what you need to do to fix the world that surrounds you, but do it with pride and dignity, not only for yourself, but those around you.
“If we open a quarrel between the past and present, we shall find that we have lost the future,” Winston Churchill. We can only move forward from today with all the tools that are available to us. If you don’t like how your government is acting, say something, do something, but not to Ms. Suleman, because she is doing exactly what the government is allowing her to do.

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DI Mail Call

Posted in Democrat, Dumbass, Mail Call, Mainstream Media, Movies, Music, Politician, PSA by Chop on 5 February 2009

DI Pride, thank you.

Over the past several days, I have received hundreds of e-mails commenting on
my articles, giving me the much needed inspiration to continue.

Below is just a sample of the e-mail frenzy that DI has taken in, I hope you enjoy.

Q.) “I love your articles, please post some pics of you with no shirt on” –
Deb from Seattle

A.) Deb, I would, but the rest of my fans would most likely hurl, thanks for
the thought anyways

Q.) “Your articles are not only informative, but extremely hilarious, keep up
the good work” Gary from Round Rock, TX

A.) Gary, thanks for those beautiful words, and if you think that my articles
are that damn hilarious, then you are just as screwed up as I am, WOW

Q.) “I never knew someone else was into BBW as much as I am, thanks for
writing that one about Jessica. I am going to show my sis and mom, they
will love it” Bobby from Tulsa

A.) Bobby, I knew there were others out there not scared to love on big women.
Keep filtering out the Medias thoughts in regards to what a woman should look
like; after all, I believe it should be up to the woman in the first place.
But please, for the love of god and all that is holy, do not love that way on
your mom and sister. Thanks for the e-mail and support.

Q.) “Thanks for the article on Pelosi, and thanks for that amazing Pic of her
on the front page” Ron from Los Angeles

A.)Ron, that picture was meant to scare the feathers off of a goose,
but whatever. Thanks for the support, but please keep supporting from very far away.

Q.) “Those public service announcements you guys do are awesome, now I do my
bestest to stay away from train tracks” Lew from Mobile, AL

A.) Lew, thanks for checking out our website, but Jesus, if you needed us to
figure out that you are not supposed to play around moving trains, then maybe
you should, but only after you check us out one more time.

Q.) “Although you are good at what you do, you have no clue what you are
talking about when it comes to PETA. We perform daily the activities needed
to ensure that animals worldwide are treated with dignity and respect, and
the lobster you speak of may now, and only now, live a prosperous life
because of our never ending work. Do more research before you blast us
again” Rhonda from Michigan
Big Rhonda, shut the hell up. Seriously, shut the hell up and get to cookin’
some squirrel
stew woman. Because of your complete idiocy, I have reduced you to pond scum,
but thanks for visiting our site, and please come back.

***NOTE*** no animals were harmed or killed in the making of this article

Q.) “What pole can’t make tea, love writing,” Raj from India

A.) I don’t know if you are referring to a Pollock not being able to make tea,
or if you love my writing so much that you want to do some pole dancing after
snorting some crystallized herbal tea. Whatever the case, it’s great that
you have tuned into our site from the very mysterious yet beautiful country of
India. Keep tuning in and stay away from all the hungry Bengal tigers.

Q.) “Thanks for supporting your troops, its nice to check out the site in
the suck that is Iraq” Chris from Iraq via Fort Hood, TX

A.) Thank you for supporting our site while supporting our site members while
supporting the rest of the free world. Honestly, I pray to god everyday
thanking him for men and women like you, the true Captain America’s. P.S.
Can you send me one of Saddam’s old pure gold shower valves so I
can post it on E-Bay?

DI will in the future post more comments in regards to the influx of e-mail.

Thanks for the support, until next time.